We often spend our entire lives searching for acceptance from the ones we love. Sometimes it is a conscious effort--basing specific life decisions on whether someone will approve or not. Other times we look for acceptance on an unconscious level. Not really knowing that our decision making etc. is somehow rooted in someone else's approval.
Examples:
Choosing A Career
Choosing Where To Live
Choosing a Mate
Becoming the Most Popular
Becoming the Wealthiest
Seeing beauty (surgical/other regimes)
Conforming to Styles - Norms of community where you live (Ex. Moving to Texas and Wearing A Cowboy Hat to Fit In)
Sometimes you just want people to accept you for who you are. (Ex. The son wanting his parents to accept that he is gay), but most often in relationships the search for acceptance can be detrimental. The reason why is that no one person can ever validate you enough. Yes, acceptance can manifest itself in many forms in our life--but the best kind is when you seek self-acceptance.
Learn to love who you are
Accept Your Faults
Accept Your Strengths
Accept Flaws
Recognize Your Beauty
Accept the Decisions You Have Made
Accept that you may have made some poor ones along the way
Accept that you may make some more and that's okay
To learn more about accepting yourself and others, try these resources:
Lisa Angelettie, M.S.W., is a psychotherapist, author, and an online advice expert. She has been helping people make smarter life choices since 1998. Visit her for Advice & Counseling, or take our free Depression Screening today.
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